Bowen sidesteps thru Homeland Security

By Destiny Givens

On arrival in Dallas Fort Worth International Airport today, three-time FNQOTY Matty Bowen (above) was taken aside by immigration officials and grilled over his religious and political views.

“Luckily I speak a bit of Arabic, so I was able to convince Akmed and Corey that I have no Islamist tendencies,” said Bowen. Back in my Muslim days I was more Sufi than anything. The whirling really helped me with my jink.”

Bowen spent more than six hours being extremely vetted by Homeland Security agents. “I coulda got out of there a couple of hours earlier,” reported Bowen, “but the guys wanted a few tips on throwing a dummy and taking the high ball. They’re big Cowboys fans.”

Bowen, the most capped Cowboy, is in Texas as a financial consultant for the Dallas Kumuls, who currently top the Western Conference of the USNRL.

Published by murraymurchison

Editor in Chief at the Trinity Beach Plain Dealer

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