Police bungle: Lowe tackled at the CowHouse, caught in possession.

By Heather Luck

Star Cowboys forward, Ethan Lowe (above), has made light of his false arrest by Townsville police that led to him being held for six hours in the drug-tank of the Walker St watch-house this morning.

Police allege that Lowe was arrested at 2am in the grounds of Cowboys House during a routine patrol. He was reportedly wearing dark clothing and a balaclava and was in possession of a large garbage bag of “indeterminate brown material”.

Failing to recognise the superstar second-rower, police took Lowe down in a textbook six-man tackle and placed him under arrest on suspicion of trespass and malfeasance. Lowe’s protestations that he was a champion footballer and the idol of millions fell on deaf ears.

It took some hours for the contents of the bag to be analysed, but the QML lab in Castle Hill eventually reported that the coarse brown material was a mixture of “cayenne pepper, chipotle sauce and schmackos”.

Lowe explained the reason behind the confusion. “I’m a massive dog-lover and an All-Blacks fan. I’ve got this side-hustle going on, producing my special gourmet spicy dog-food. I was just on my way out to make a delivery to the wholesaler when plod pounced. Great tackle actually, couldn’t offload. I had my long sleeved AB kit on so they couldn’t see me tatts for identification purposes. Copped a bit of summary justice and niggle in the backseat but that’s fair enough. An honest mistake.”

Senior Sergeant Thomas Grubb of Townsville police said that the officers involved would be stood-down pending the result of an investigation. “We can’t have our officers ankle-tapping and going the flop on a Cowboy, even if the suspect looks like a shifty kiwi drug-dealer,” he said.

Lowe is keen to put the incident behind him. “It’s cool,” he said. “I made some good contacts today while I was in stir, and the coppers will know me next time they spot me lurking in the wee hours in the vicinity of the CowHouse in me AB gear and balaclava.”

The Cowboys humiliated the Broncos on Friday night and will face the hopeless Lottoland Sea-Eagles next weekend at ‘The Smiles’. Co-captain Matt Scott has had his right leg temporarily removed for reconstruction and will miss the remainder of the season.

Fortunately, Lowe was in no doubt that he would be fit and ready for the match, and did confirm that “on the inside the sun still shines”.

Published by murraymurchison

Editor in Chief at the Trinity Beach Plain Dealer

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