By Kimberley Schloss
Christians in the Far North are abuzz with the prospect of a cinematic collaboration between plain-talking evangelist Pat Robertson and superstar actor, Kevin Sorbo.
The two giants of down-home commonsensicality are in talks to produce a modern day celluloid parable aimed at drawing attention to the insidious march of evil forces in the modern world.
Sorbo describes the as yet untitled film as “Ghostbusters meets God is Not Dead 2 with a dash of Milk.”
Robertson is a two-time winner of the IgNobel Peace Prize and has, on several occasions, made eerily correct prophesies based on information passed to him directly by the Almighty. Although Jesus has not yet offered any input into the new film, Robertson is understood to be hopeful that the film will help to “usher in the end times and allow to our Lord to deal with those queers once and for all.”
Michelle Mulgrave, Secretary General of the Cairns Christian Coalition, an ecumenical group of like-minded Christians, has been scouring online sources for any nugget of information about the project.
“I always interested in a faith-friendly and uplifting movie that I can take my four kiddies to see and know that there won’t be any filthiness,” opined Mrs Mulgrave. “Matthew, Mark, Luke and Joanne love a big-screen romp and they’re super-massive Sorbo fans. I hope Lucy Lawless is in it.”
When contacted for comment, the President of the Springfield Atheists and Sceptics Alliance (SASA), Jonas Humberstone, declined to be interviewed, explaining that he had “just had a haircut.”