Welcome, Mary Jane?

By Paolo Zupp

With the recent legalisation of medical marijuana usage, North Queensland pharmacists and other allied health service providers are struggling to find a way to provide their clients with the best possible care.

Josh Brendixsen, a pharmacist at Amcal Chemist Smithfield, explained the obstacles. “We’ve been unable to source the prescribed medication from normal sources,” he said. “Pfizer have been the quickest to respond, but they are still working out the production chain from Mexico to here. And the demand has been sky high, especially among tradies and housewives.”

Mr Murray ‘Jane’ Simmonds, spokesman for the Jay Keef Collective, the peak industry body for marijuana dealers in FNQ, has previously been critical of the need for importing product as it could be sourced locally. But he has since embraced the new legislation, and sees it as a business growth opportunity.

“Once Kurt and me get our cert 4 done, we’re planning to do a deal with Chemist Warehouse. That Amcal fucker can get fucked,” Mr Simmonds said. “We have the choicest medical grade spliff that we can cut with some Biboohra Bhang or some Conjuboy Cooch to give it a bit of zing. Or whatever works medically. And, if pain persists, for fuck’s sake see your doctor.”

Mr Simmonds stressed that only customers that explicitly require the drug for medical purposes are required to have a prescription from a GP with EFTPOS available at a 3% surcharge. Other customers must pay in cash with used bills.

Published by murraymurchison

Editor in Chief at the Trinity Beach Plain Dealer

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