February 2019 Classifieds

Looking For Love Hopelessly romantic, cuddly soon-to-be professional knife-thrower looking for brave woman with small head and big hair for target practice and chill. Maybe more. @william_tell_in_black_jeans Wanted Needed: Partner in pyramid chicken plucking scheme. It’s a job no one wants which makes it the perfect scalable opportunity. You benefit from other people’s plucking. GoldmineContinue reading “February 2019 Classifieds”

Good times – the best of the wet!

By Heather Luck Plain Dealer IT specialist, Edson Yeung, got a little surprise when he sat down in his car to drive to the office today. Edson found that the steering wheel of his 1998 Honda Civic was coated with a layer of tropical mould (above). The car is reportedly otherwise in very good condition.Continue reading “Good times – the best of the wet!”

iShow the bridesmaid again

By Destiny Givens After a disappointing night at the Allan Border Medal, in which he failed to take home a single award, Ben Dunk, the Innisfail Show, has again faced up to the out-swing of disappointment with his Melbourne Stars losing to the Renegades in the BBL final. Dunk’s performance with the bat, scoring theContinue reading “iShow the bridesmaid again”

Suspected Banksy artwork subject to Pest Control in Trinity Beach

By Murray Murchison Trinity Beach locals are in a buzz over the possibility that graffiti artist and activist, Banksy, has created one of his trademark artworks (above) on the Red Cross sign located near the skate-park on Trinity Beach Road. The striking white inscription was first noticed and reported by council worker, Shane Hestermann, whoContinue reading “Suspected Banksy artwork subject to Pest Control in Trinity Beach”

Popup pharmacy a big hit

By Allan Povah Rudi Samanchara, assistant manager at the Chemist Warehouse in the City was overjoyed with the turnout to their popup pharmacy on Grafton Street for Chinese New Year celebrations. “We are so happy with the success of the venture, and by the way, Gōngxǐ fācái everyone!” said Ms Samanchara. “The baby-food was allContinue reading “Popup pharmacy a big hit”

Livio Regano awarded HipMoi Peace Prize

By Heather Luck. The 9th annual Lions Club HipMoi Peace Prize has been awarded to popular weatherman, meteorologist and raconteur, Livio Regano. The somewhat lavish ceremony was held at the Cairns Hilton, and masterfully presided over by host John Burgess. The slightly rumpled storm-watcher was gracious in his acceptance of the award, acknowledging the originalContinue reading “Livio Regano awarded HipMoi Peace Prize”

Doberman challenges ‘world champion’ Patriots

By Destiny Givens Quarterback for the Trinity Beach Dobermen, Cobey Callahan, has been vocal in his criticism that the winners of a recent Gridiron match in Atlanta, the New England Patriots (above), have been called called “world champions”. Callahan also described the style of football played by the Patriots as “pedestrian”, “soft” and has laidContinue reading “Doberman challenges ‘world champion’ Patriots”

Murchison fails in sphere attempt, possible sombrero toggle outcome

By Paolo Zupp Melissa Murchison, 9, of Parramatta Park, has failed in her attempt to sculpt a perfect alfoil ball. Since her brother, Mitchell, achieved the feat in 2017, Melissa, along with thousands of other children, have been attempting to replicate it. None of them have met with success. Miss Murchison has been accused ofContinue reading “Murchison fails in sphere attempt, possible sombrero toggle outcome”