July 2019 Classifieds

Looking For Love Brinsmead man, 23, with blue penis, willing to sit for hottie portrait artist (18-22). Available this week (and next week too if you’re into BO). If you want him angry, it can be arranged no problem. Open to long-term arrangement. @reecewinters. Wanted Wanted: Sunscreen substitute for conscientious abstainer, Must be SPF 1000Continue reading “July 2019 Classifieds”

June 2019 Classifieds

Looking For Love Kuranda women, 46, disappointed by love but aspirationally intact, seeking earthy, hirsute flower gentleman for love-making under the stars. Must be snipped. No southern-cross tattoos. @janellespiritguide Wanted Wanted: Model of the great pyramid in Giza. If you’ve got a Sphinx as well, we would consider it. Full scale preferred. Must be ableContinue reading “June 2019 Classifieds”

May 2019 Classifieds

Wanted Looking for travel buddy to go to North Korea and Yemen with BLT in October. Must be up for anything, even gaejang-guk and extradition. Prefer busty Swedish type. Full disclosure: I can get a bit handsy on a bellyful of Pyongyang Pilsner. No offence taken tho. @wayne_jones Wanted: Large mockup of Eiffel Tower. WillContinue reading “May 2019 Classifieds”

April 2019 Classifieds

Looking For Love Shortish man, swarthy but not too much, looking for tall coffee-coloured woman for breeding. Profits 50/50. Please email your pedigree and recent photo (pref nude) to andy_pants@gmail.com. Wanted Anyone has had some kind of stroke or car accident or syphilis or other tragedy …please don’t worry. If you have a BTS ticket,Continue reading “April 2019 Classifieds”

Verne classic to be remastered

By Destiny Givens. Jules Verne fans are abuzz today, with the news that a remake of Around the World in Eighty Days has been green-lit by North Queensland streaming service, Buffer. Executive Producer, Deborah Mailman, has said that the production will be inspired by the whimsical Australian cartoon series (above) from the 1970s, rather thanContinue reading “Verne classic to be remastered”