Boney Corporation acquires Plain Dealer

Multinational media behemoth, Boney Corporation, has acquired the Trinity Beach Plain Dealer for an undisclosed sum. As a result, the Plain Dealer joins a venerable group of publications in the Boney stable, including the Sydney Morning Herald, L’Equipe and the Innisfail Sentinel. Editor in chief, Murray Murchison was enthusiastic about the development and was clearlyContinue reading “Boney Corporation acquires Plain Dealer”

Gilmore plan: Jihadists to camp at Tinaroo

By Murray Murchison Following crushing defeats in Iraq and Syria, global jihadists are casting their eyes south in search of a new base. ‘Big’ Tom Gilmore, mayor of Mareeba, has announced an ambitious plan to bring the group to the Tablelands which, he says, will occasion an economic boom for the region. “It would beContinue reading “Gilmore plan: Jihadists to camp at Tinaroo”

June 2017 Classifieds

Looking For Love Semi-dedicated jihadist looking for sympathetic but modest woman for pre-virgin practice, short-term opportunity pre-boom. Hijabi preferred or Swedish. @moBoom  To the skate-babe wearing rags who boarded past the Dumpling Studio on Sheridan on Sunday evening. You’re cool and super-hot. Meet me at the TB skate park any arvo. I’ll show you myContinue reading “June 2017 Classifieds”

Muxes of Mareeba announce dating workshops

By Heather Luck Tablelands Community group, the Muxes of Mareeba (MoM), have announced a series of dating workshops for men, aimed to help lonely and isolated men attain the skills that will enable them snare their perfect love match. The Muxes, who are a popular part of the vibrant Mexican community on the Tablelands, areContinue reading “Muxes of Mareeba announce dating workshops”

Sikhs are the most popular Tinder partners, Jihadists in with a chance

By Shirley Higgins-Croft Academics at the William Bligh University Faculty of Comportment have released the results of a survey of young women aimed at determining community attitudes in dating standards. In the survey, eighty-one thousand young women, aged between eighteen and nineteen-and-a-half, were presented with a Tinder image of a slightly-swarthy but objectively good looking youngContinue reading “Sikhs are the most popular Tinder partners, Jihadists in with a chance”